I feel so bad about liking Hetalia! I really do. Like a lot. But I just can't stop loving it either! D:

The reason for all this self-loathing is that it makes me feel like I almost like WWII and stuff related to it. I laugh at these things. And there is something seriously wrong when you say that. I find my self thinking that Nazi Germany and Facist Italy and a lot of other horrible things are cute or funny! Of course it's not like I'd go all "Yay, genocide! :D" or something and when I look at character of Germany I don't think him as Hitler/Göbbels/all-those-other-nazi-leaders but more like the people of Germany (and naturally this includes all the jews etc.) who were suffering greatly.

But still.

During past weeks I've been researching WWII quite a lot. I've been reading books, internet and watching documentaries. And the stuff I've come across has shaken my world. It's not like I wouldn't have heard about all kinds of awful things during my life but these things have been beoynd it all.

I was reading this one book. I had to stop it few days ago because it was making me feel so disgusted I almost couldn't sleep anymore. And a documentary about the atomic bombings. The tales of children who had surviver and drawings they had made about what they saw... Honestly, what happened to millions of women and children of East Prussia has left such a bitter mark in my faith in humanity I'm not sure if it'll ever heal. I thought a true story couldn't get a lot worse than that Austrian guy who locked his daughter to a cellar but this is. So Much Worse. And I haven't even said anything concerning concentration camps yet! Everyone knows how much that sucked...

I just felt like I had to get all that off my heart. And actually, one of the main reasons I like APH is that it gives me a probably naïve but hopeful feeling that maybe there is a slight possibility that people might finally understand that we are all part of the same species and there is no point in killing others over stupid disputes. You know, because of the "one united world"-idea but also because this fandom is full of nice and tolerant people.